Best. Wedding Announcement. Ever.

Yep. That's a sword.

I solemnly swear that this is the funniest wedding announcement I’ve ever read.

Last night some friends alerted me to the August 6 NYT write-up of the nuptials of two UVA grads, and I have to admit, I was captivated. I read every single word–and then read it again. I couldn’t look away. I’m not sure whether the writer, Lois Smith Brady, was channeling James Marsden in 27 Dresses or if she was just especially inspired, but I hope she wins a Pulitzer for her animated prose. If it were April, I’d swear it was a joke. The caption alone is classic–“The couple took a sword to the cake!”–and it just gets better from there. Here’s an excerpt (I’ve taken the liberty of highlighting a few choice phrases):

It was so sunny on July 31, the day Alice Anne Stephens and Thomas Preston Lloyd Jr. were married, that the tall stained-glass windows at St. John’s Episcopal Cathedral in Denver were as bright as high-definition TV screens.

The persistent, Type-A sunshine was perfect for Ms. Stephens, 27, and Mr. Lloyd, 28. Both are intense, hard-charging lawyers who seem to rarely stumble or pause, in their sentences or in their lives. They take the pursuit of excellence very seriously.

At the University of Virginia, where they met as undergraduates, both were members of “the uber-involved student leader crowd,” said Kat Shea, a friend. Mr. Lloyd said he enjoys projects that “sharpen my pencil intellectually.”

Describing their courtship, Ms. Brady goes on to say:

. . . That fall, she was his date for the Colonnade Ball, an annual university tradition. “They play the Virginia reel,” she said. “Boys line up on one side, girls on the other. The girls curtsy and the boys bow and then you do-si-do with your partner.” They were not a bit lost on the dance floor.

. . . On their breaks from studying, they would go out into a meadow together and read more-relaxing books, like Paul Theroux travelogues (her) and essays on naval history (him).

Wherever they went, he insisted on opening doors for her. “I’d start walking up to a door,” she said, “and he’d cough and say: ‘You’ve got to let me open that door. You have to practice that more.’ ”

Even while on the same campus, they gave each other handwritten love letters. Both have perfect spelling, even without a spell-checker. His letters stood out, though, for their length and literary flourishes. “My writing is straight emotion and his is beautifully done,” she said. “He would always close with, ‘Ever I remain, truly yours.’ I’d just write, ‘Love.’ ”

For the entire piece (you won’t be disappointed), click here.

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4 Comments

Filed under I'm just sayin'

4 responses to “Best. Wedding Announcement. Ever.

  1. Susan O'Neal

    I hope their marriage is more exciting that that article. Just a little over the top!!!

  2. HAHA oh my. This is absolutely entertaining. Thanks for the Wednesday-morning laughter.

  3. Agreed. I went to school with the groom.

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